Healing & Dealing with Trauma – A Collab w/Karen Lewis, Jr. |#minoritymentalhealth

What started out as a regular smegular conversation has turned into this.

During this COVID season, I’ve made some great connections with folks, virtually. It is definitely a time for networking & collaborations.

Since I quit my government job back in January, I’ve been quite deliberate when it comes to doing things that are in alignment. In flow.

I met the feisty, no holds barred, F-bomb dropping phenom Karen Lewis, Jr. back in 2011. A mutual friend of ours introduced us (virtually) because of our love of writing.

She reached out to me via email and we exchanged ideas as well as our writing projects for feedback. I was too geeked when she showed up at my book signing in March 2013. It was the first time I met her in real life 😍

Our personalities in a pic

Fast forward to 2020. We both have a passion for using our voice. We both have a passion for healing and self growth. So when she asked if I would join her for LIVE conversations and real discussions about Black people and mental health, I said HELL YEAH!!!

Let’s Talk About It, Fam is a breath of fresh air. It’s conversations between good friends. It’s in your face realness.

The first episode is on YouTube . Yes, we have a YouTube channel AAAYYYEEE! That shows you how serious we are LOL.

We received some good feedback during the live video. Folks were interacting, too.

Check us out and tell a friend. And if you have something you want to discuss, let’s talk about it, fam.

Until next time…

Black Horror, Lovecraft Country, Racism, & being a Black filmmaker| Interview w/Kimberly Batchelor Davis | #LovecraftCountry #blackhorror

Me & Kim B. Davis

I had theee absolute best time on Kimberly Batchelor Davis’ The Kim B. Davis Show. We talked about Black horror, Lovecraft Country, & being a Black filmmaker today. Some good stuff.

Check out the Full Interview on YouTube here!

And, if you’re more of a listener, here’s the Podcast version.

Chakra Series: The Crown |by Phette Hollins

We made it, part 7 of 7 in the Chakra Series.

I hope you got a chance to check out the other videos in the series. If not, worry not. You can watch them all HERE!

Let me know what you thought about the series. I hope it brought awareness and enlightenment🧘🏿‍♀️

Until next time…

The Crown Chakra

The Crown Chakra

Chakra Series: Third Eye Chakra |by Phette Hollins

We’re almost there.

This is Part 6 of 7 in the Chakra Series, which consists of short videos explaining what chakras are and their roles in our lives.

If you like what you’ve seen so far, please tell your friends. You can scroll down and check out previous posts to see the other videos in the series.

Which chakra(s) is your favorite so far? Mine are the throat and the sacral💛💜💛.

The Third Eye

Third Eye Chakra

Chakra Series: The Throat Chakra |by Phette Hollins

Heeeyyyy.

You made it to Part 5 of 7 of the Chakra Series.

Honestly, it doesn’t matter in which order you watch the videos. I just started from the bottom (root) to the top (crown).

See ya next week…

The Throat Chakra

The Throat Chakra

Chakra Series: The Heart Chakra |by Phette Hollins

And we’re moving right along.

Welcome to Part 4 of 7 in the Chakra Series. I hope you’re enjoying them so far.

You can check out Part 1, 2, & 3 by clicking on the respective numbers.

Here’s Part 4 – The Heart Chakra

The Heart Chakra

[video] How to get what you want | by Phette Hollins | #abandonmentissues #lawofattraction

If you want to know why it is that you’re not getting the things that you want and how to shift that A.S.A.P., check out the LIVE VIDEO I did last week on my Facebook page. I was told that it was pretty good.

‘I May Destroy You’ Finale | Review by Phette Hollins | #sexualassault #rape #stealthing

Let me breathe first because, whew! There’s so much to unpack in this show. I’m not big on small talk so I’ma just dive right in.

The first episode follows Arabella, played by the amazingly talented Michaela Coel, who created, wrote, directed, and stars in the show, as she struggles to complete the draft of her second book. She’s tempted by all types of distractions and finally caves by going to a bar with her friends.

Higher than ten kites, she gets date raped. The rest of the episodes throughout the season are of her trying to remember who do it and, also, how to cope.

To her publisher, her behavior is erratic and unacceptable as she keeps stalling with her draft. But, she is hella traumatized. Her “relationship” with her douche-bag of a boyfriend fizzles. She joins a support group, tries painting and a few other things to cope with the pain.

One of the things she does to numb her feelings is by having sex with a guy, who ends up violating her in a major way when he removes his condom during sex, without her knowledge or consent. This adds to her already deep trauma.

We learn in the second to the last episode that she finally remembers who date raped her. Over a period of days, she goes back to the bar to jog her memory because a perpetrator always returns to the scene of the crime.

This is when it gets gooder LOL!

Michaela’s brilliant ass gives us THREE ALTERNATIVE ENDINGS! They were the perfect blend of transmutation and the shadow self.

To transmute is to change from one form to another. For instance, turning our pain into power, our trauma into triumph, our lessons into blessings. Like, how Mary J. Blige took all of what she went through with K-Ci and her ex-husband Kendu and transmuted those into heartfelt songs. Or how Beyonce’ took the lemons from Jay Z’s philandering and literally made Lemonade (one of her best albums, in my opinion).

Everyone has a shadow self. A dark side. ALL OF US!! But, most of us keep it hidden, suppressed. our persona (ego self), the face we show the world, is usually not the real us. It’s the “nice” us. The politically correct us. You’d be amazed to see how people truly are behind closed doors, away from the world, hidden.

The beauty happens when we can incorporate the shadow with the light for a blend of melodious harmony. No one is all bad just like no one is all good. One cannot exist without the other. Where there is dark there is light. Up, down. Front, back. Left, right. Easy, hard. Polarities are all around us.

But, because we’re taught to pretend and hide those things that are deemed “bad,” or go against our society, our culture, our family, we judge those who outwardly portray what we assume should be hidden. A sexually liberated woman, for example. We like sex but can’t talk about it.

Sex is natural. Sex should be enjoyable. Sex connects and bonds. Yet, we don’t talk about it. Can’t talk about it. We’re taught that sex is bad. Then we wonder why priests molest young kids. They’re sexually frustrated. Suppressing our sexual desires is unnatural, except, UNLESS, your desire is to violate kids then, in that case, suppress that shit.

When we suppress our negative energies and anger instead of transmuting it and channeling it another way, we blow up from bottling it in, which can result in abuse, violence, and even murder.

Have you ever been so mad that you could spit fire? Have you ever imagined smacking or punching somebody in the face? Or worse? Would you admit it if you did?

Have you ever seen the movie Enough with Jennifer Lopez? The one where she left her abusive husband, learned how to protect herself and killed him in the end? We clapped like hell. Why? Because there’s something within us who (secretly) loves revenge. If it weren’t for laws, rules, and regulations, many of us would be acting like we’re in the movie The Purge. TV shows and movies provide a great escape because they get to act out our shadow selves while we stay on the right side of the law.

So, when Arabella tricks her rapist into fake date raping her so that she and her ride or die friends could set him up by injecting him with the drug AND then fatally beating him to a bloody pulp, my initial reaction was that of excitement but quickly turned into disbelief. Somehow it seemed over-the-top, unreal. Turns out, it was. Then came the second alternative ending. I was like OMG! THIS IS DOPE!!!

In this scenario, she imagines the rapist opening up to her, sharing his trauma, his backstory. The why behind his behavior. WHAT THE FUUUUCCCCKKKKKK!!! I’d never seen anything like this before.

Those who know me in real life know that I am a Human Vault, Keeper of Secrets. People share all of their deepest, darkest secrets with me. And, because of this and my gift of clairsentience, I’m able to understand why an astute businessman with a loving wife and 3 kids, who all sit in the third pew at church every Sunday, cheats. One of my sayings is “You can’t understand where a person is coming from unless you know where he comes from.”

Arabella comforts her rapist as he cries in her arms about coming from generations of abusers. The imagined ending ends with police arresting him AND, following close behind, is the beat up, bloodied version of himself (from the first alternative ending) that was tucked under Arabella’s bed. Carrying in his hand was a clear plastic bag that housed an ultrasound and soiled clothing from a miscarriage she had. All symbolic of her releasing the pain, the trauma, the baggage that was keeping her STUCK.

She finishes her book and publishes it independently, alas transmutation.

[Video] ‘I May Destroy You’ Episode 8 | Review by Phette Hollins | #michaelacoel #sexualassault #stealthing

Watch on YouTube

Episode 8 Review

Chakra Series: The Solar Plexus Chakra |by Phette Hollins

Hey now heeeyyy.

Today is all about the Solar Plexus Chakra. This is Part 3 of 7 in the video series.

How are you liking the series so far? Leave a comment below.

The Solar Plexus Chakra

The Solar Plexus Chakra
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